Revolution of Love.com Blog

Although our hearts are heavy with grief, I must say that this burden has been incredibly lighter through your prayers and the grace of God. I would often read of saints or holy people speak of suffering as a great blessing but I could not understand how such a thing could be possible. I am far from holy but I think I have gotten a tiny taste of what that means.

The other night I could not sleep and I lay in bed thinking and praying. I pondered over my life and how many graces and blessing God has poured out on me. I thought of trials I have endured in the past and during those times I often thought of Jesus in the Garden asking, �Lord, if it be your will let this cup pass over me.� I, too, prayed that I would be spared. More often than not, I was. I felt like Abraham ready of sacrifice his Isaac but at the last minute it was revealed that the mere offering was enough. I need not actually make the sacrifice. Yesterday, however, God asked for the sacrifice of our child to become a reality.

Perhaps I should be angry with God, at least temporarily, but I am not. God has been so good to me. I have been granted tremendous mercy and numerous graces in my life. And now God has finally given me the chance to truly make an offering of love to Him. Placing our child back into God�s hands is my way of being able to show God that I appreciate all his blessings and I trust in his goodness in both the good and sorrowful times.

But before you even think of making any comments on my �strength� know that it is not me. Left to my own devices I�d be a wailing drama queen. (As those who really know me well could attest.) I know firmly within my heart that it is the grace of God, particularly those received through your prayers. And I must say that Brian has been a pillar of strength and trust in God, even through his own grief and pain. Even little Bella, not quite understanding what�s going on, will place her little arms around my neck, kissing me telling me, �It�s okay, Mama.� God is present and comforting me everywhere I turn.

I also can�t help but remember that in the end our children are not our own. They are given to us with the responsibility that we raise them as holy children as best we can so that one day they may be united with God in heaven. Now we know that we have at least one little saint in heaven who is praying and waiting for us to join him in heaven. That is a great blessing. There will always be an emptiness on our hearts that misses our little baby and we still have a great deal of sorrow but at the same time there is also a great deal of peace. Our Lady, on this beautiful feast day, has wrapped her mantle around us and has given us great comfort and strength.

We thank you once again for your prayers and love. Our prayers remain with you as well.

With love and trust in Our Lord and Lady,
Bobbi & Brian (& Bella)

�We know that in everything God works for good with those who love Him who are called according to his purpose.� - Romans 8:28

Our Lady of Lourdes, Pray for Us!