Recently in living the faith Category

For the next few Weigh-in Wednesdays I'll be doing a book study of Hallie Lord's Style, Sex, and Substance: 10 Catholic Women Consider the Things that Really Matter . You can read comments for Chapter 1 here.

When I first saw that this chapter was about style, I immediately thought that I wouldn't get much out of it. After all, I pictured "Ms. Betty Beguiles" to be the epitome of a womanly wife - feminine, flirty (to her hubby, that is!) and godly, all dressed in a cute dress and heels. I think we all have our own little vision in our head of what a "stylish" wife should look like. Maybe we fit the image or maybe, like me, you seem far from it.

My Style (or lack of it) - As I was reading Hallie's chapter the first time around, I couldn't help but think back to how my style has developed over the years. I have always been...what did they call it...big boned...pretty plus...yeah, whatever they called it, I was not wearing the cute little outfits my skinny friends were wearing. As I got older I loved stylish clothes but was very limited to what I could find that fit me well. I think I compensated for it by becoming an expert at accessorizing - jewelry, handbags, shoes. Those things I could find without worrying about size.

Slowly I moved away from that, though, and the other day I was trying to figure out why. In my late teens and early twenties I started exploring more of the world. I grew up very naive and somewhat secluded. I made new friends who had a big influence on me and I fell away from God. My friends were either into dark clothing, tattoos and piercings (long before it became mainstream) or they were into skateboards and punk music. At that point my mode of dress was plaid shorts, converse shoes (or doc martens) and a band t-shirt. My favorite colors were navy blue, army green and brown. (Sounds a little military.) I would have rather died than go out in public in something pink or frilly! That slowly changed (as I mention later) but even after marrying I have always gravitated towards being more tomboy.

When I first started reading Hallie's blog I loved how she embraced her femininity without seeming "prissy." Over the last couple of years, I have finally let go of that more "tomboy" mentality. I still hate wearing dresses or skirts and run from any shoe that has a heel more than ½ an inch but I can now say my favorite colors are red, orange and yellow - bright and happy colors. I like wearing pink and buying things that are less boyish and more "cute." I have definitely been influenced by Hallie and her website Betty Beguiles.com and have learned to better embrace my feminine side.

Okay, enough of my thoughts about Hallie and style in general, now I'll comment on the book.

Conversion and the "New" You - The beginning topic reaffirms what was discussed by Jen in Chapter 1. Speaking of her own conversion and the need to change Hallie says:

"But, of course, giving up our identity isn't what [God] asks of us, is it? Yes, we are called to constant conversion. Yes, we are called to become more Christ-like. But we are not called to jettison our personalities and passions."

Again, God is reminding me that I am my own unique person. Daily conversion doesn't require me to erase who I am; rather, it takes the essence of me and makes it better. It reminds me of a saying that my mom always said, "God loves you just the way you are, but He also loves you too much to leave you that way." The Holy Spirit wants to guide us and mold us into incredible women of God but women of God with our own unique quirks and tastes. I picture it like walking through a garden. Some flowers are stately and regal roses. Some are delicate orchids. Some playful daisies. Some sturdy but cheerful sunflowers. Each flower is different but equally beautiful in its own way.

Does Modesty = Prairie Skirts? - Hallie makes an excellent point in sharing that sometimes we can mistake being "modest" for being "dowdy." I know that when I was younger and my parents came back to the faith and started really practicing it, they made a lot of changes in the house. This was the same time I went through my own conversion so I agreed to make drastic changes. It was not easy for me to go from wearing shorts and converse to wearing long prairie skirts and ridiculously large pocket tees. But we thought that was what God wanted. Thankfully, we came to realize that we don't have to go from one extreme to the other. There is a happy medium and although it may take a little work, a faithful Catholic can marry style and modesty together.

Confidence Booster - Hallie talks about makeover shows and the power of transformation. She says:

"She is the same person she always was, but her new physical appearance brings forth elements of herself that were hidden before -- elements that have the potential to effect change not only in her own life, but in the lives of all with whom she comes into contact."

That is so true! It can be something very simple or something drastic. I remember a year or two ago my sister came back from the hair salon and she looked fabulous. I was again complaining about my hair using such terms as "rat's nest" and "brillo pad." She laughed and said that we had basically the same type of hair and that I should get it professionally cut instead of using the kitchen sheers to hack off a couple inches every 6 months. I conceded but it wasn't easy.

I don't know why (and I laugh at it now) but I had the hardest time doing it. First I didn't know where to go. Second, I didn't want to spend the money. Third, I just felt stupid trying to fix myself up. (Maybe that was some of the tomboy residue in me.) Finally, I found a convenient place with a sweetheart of a stylist who understood my crazy, curly hair and I worked it into our budget to see her on a more regular basis. I remember coming out of the salon trying to remember when was the last time I actually loved my hair! I told that to Brian when I got home and he gave me that smile that men give their wives that says, "I don't get what the big deal is but if you are happy then I am happy too." Feeling good about yourself will definitely affect how you relate to yourself, your family and those around you.

Vanity of Vanities - Hallie gives some excellent points in regards to the difference between caring for yourself and getting caught up in vanity. Although I could not relate to her need to dress like June Cleaver (I break out in hives at the mere thought of wearing heels) I could definitely relate to the need to examine our motives. As women, I think this is especially important. Whether we are tomboys or divas, there is always the potential for doing things for the wrong reasons. Whether it is working out in the gym to the extreme so you will look hot in a two piece bikini at the beach. Or maybe it's putting on some extra makeup to impress the cute dad who frequents the same park or play group. Or maybe it's in the opposite direction and letting yourself look tired and frumpy so your husband won't make any physical advances at you that night. Okay, these examples may seem far fetched in our particular situations but we are all guilty of doing things for the wrong reasons and if we ask God he'll enlighten our hearts to let us know if we are on the right path or need a little work.

Balance - I love Hallie's explanation of having different seasons in our lives. For me the most trying season is with a newborn. On those days getting in a shower every other day was a cause for rejoicing. That would be what she calls a "survival season." (Now that the baby is one year old my season has eased up considerably.) I love this paragraph here:

"I think I understand balance better these days. It's a constant struggle as seasons of plenty and of want come and go, as hormones fluctuate, and as life throws new challenges in my direction. But this much I know: We women have got to find a way to be merciful toward ourselves without completely throwing in the towel; to surrender to the hard times while still fighting for our ideals; and to remain open to God's grace while accepting that sometimes that grace isn't going to look and feel how we might hope. So how do we do this? With a whole lot of prayer and a few good habits."

Perfectly stated. I also liked Hallie's recommendation of doing one small thing for yourself each day to boost our well being. On some days my treat is still to let Brian watch the kids so I can take an uninterrupted shower. Or it will be to drive to Costco all by myself with the radio blaring. Other times it is having a half hour to post on the blog and clear my head through writing. My biggest struggle is maintaining that balance. There will be days I give and give and give until I am about to lose it. Other times I rationalize that I need some "me time" and go on the internet only to find that two hours later I haven't done the laundry, washed the dishes, changed diapers or started dinner. So for me, I work on balancing getting my responsibilities done and still having a little break for myself.

A Healthier Me - Hallie stated:

"Every woman's physical needs are going to manifest themselves differently. At a bare minimum, though, we ought to be striving for four things: healthy eating, regular exercise, adequate rest, and occasional peaceful pampering."

This is the area I reeeally struggle with! It is hard to make time to exercise! Even this morning as I was getting the kids ready for school I kept arguing with myself that I should skip my exercise this morning because I have a,b,c,d,e,f,g... to accomplish before the day is over. Yet, I knew I had to keep exercise a priority and not automatically shove it under the bus. I was tired and wasn't in the mood but I persevered and got it done. As usual, I felt much better when I was done and somehow managed to still complete the other things I needed to do. (Or, at least came pretty darn close.) I am still struggling with the healthy eating but I am slowly making progress at making better choices. After all I used to consider ketchup and apple pie as two servings of fruits and vegetables. (Oops, did I just admit that out loud?) So I've come a long way but still have a longer way to go. But one step at a time. ;-)

Well, this took a little longer than I anticipated to write down but I am glad I did it. It helped me sort it out in my head. But the kids are now tugging at my feet so I better sign off. Have a great afternoon! (And xoxo to sweet Hallie. ;-)

As I mentioned last week, for the next few Weigh-in Wednesdays I'll be doing a book study of Hallie Lord's Style, Sex, and Substance: 10 Catholic Women Consider the Things that Really Matter . I had been making notes over the week but yesterday I was ready to forget the whole idea.

Yesterday was an awful day. Seriously, it wasn't the usual busy and stressful day of mishaps. It was different and I couldn't put my finger on why. When Brian came home I went to my room, locked the door and begged God to help me and literally cried myself to sleep. I haven't felt like that in a long, long time.

A half an hour later I opened my eyes and came out of the room like a weight was off me. Brian hugged me and asked if the demons had been attacking me. It clicked. That is exactly what it felt like. The interior struggles were like familiar demons that I have not battled in a long time. In my experiences, usually when there is a "spiritual attack" it means God is preparing a turning point... some good fruit that will come out of a particular situation.

I am not sure what that situation is. Maybe it's my own personal growth as I am studying this book. Maybe it's the trip Bella and I are taking tomorrow. Maybe it's something I am not yet aware of. Whatever it is, yesterday I thought I'd never post this book discussion because I was the last person that should be sharing lessons with you. But now that the fog has lifted and I am at peace again, I'll go ahead and post what I've written so far. If you haven't read the book yet, hopefully it will encourage you to pick up a copy. It truly will be one of the best $10 you ever spent. :-)

I love Jennifer Fulwiler's writings and was pleased to see that she covered the first chapter of the book: How I Fell Out of My Minivan and Found Myself. After wiping the tears of laughter from my eyes from her Dukes of Hazzard's van story, I was hooked by this paragraph.

"I had a specific idea of what the authentic Catholic woman was like: She was the picture of joy and grace every time she went to Mass and always had an emotionally powerful experience upon receiving the Eucharist; she kept her home tidy; and she joyfully crafted elaborate celebrations for each liturgical season."

I could relate to Jen's feeling of inadequacy. In fact, this is a topic God has been drilling into me for the last 9 months. It all started last summer when I wrote the post Those Perfect Catholic Moms Are Killing Me. I had been reading a number of Catholic mom blogs and seeing all their accomplishments at homemaking and motherhood was making me feel like a loser.

As days and weeks passed I told myself that I can't help it if I was messy and disorganized and that I couldn't sew a button or keep a plant alive more than a week. So what if I get impatient and fired up at the slightest mishap, especially on the days when I forgot to spend time in prayer because I was too busy checking my facebook and emails. That's just how I am.

But it was bothering me. Is that it? Am I to resign myself to "just being myself." I knew there was plenty of room for improvement. Then I started reading the book The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers - Reclaiming Our Passion, Purpose, and Sanity by Meg Meeker, MD.and the first Habit was called Understand Your Value as a Mother. In my post about it I talked about feeling inferior, rediscovering my talents and listening to the promptings of the Holy Spirit. In one part I wrote:

"It's funny that once I stopped comparing myself to my perceived super moms (after all, I am seeing a tiny, sanitized glimpse of their lives,) I started seeing that I possessed some of those same talents that I admired in them. It is as if my creative side woke up. I started posting on my blog again because I love having an outlet to write. I've tried new recipes and found cooking fun again. I've started organizing small sections of the house and realized I, too, could be organized. (Relatively speaking. ;-)"

That got me to thinking - what is "me" and what's a warped vision of me? Then I read Jen's words:

"To uncover your unique brand of holiness, you have to sift through your God-given quirks and talents from your sins."

Suddenly the light bulb clicked on. That's it! (If I was an Oprah fan I'd say it was my AHA! moment.) That's what the Holy Spirit was trying to tell me! Separate the quirks from the sins. I had my own unique calling and vocation that matched my personality and my temperament. I didn't have to become a carbon copy of mom A, B or C. I just had to be the best version of me and slowly God is showing me how to achieve that.

Jen sums it up using one of my favorite quotes:

"St. Catherine of Siena famously stated, "Be who God meant you to be, and you will set the world on fire." We tend to focus on the second, more dramatic part of the statement, but the first is just as important: Be who God meant you to be. Embrace the one-of-a-kind brand of holiness that God has chosen for you. Reject your sins, but love your quirks."

Perfectly stated.

At the end of the chapter, there are a number of questions for deeper reflection. I'll share one of the questions and my reflection with you.

#4. What saint has challenged your ideas about what holy people are like? What did he or she do that surprised you?

A saint that forever changed the way I think about holiness is St. Francis de Sales. My old parish was named after him and I remember the pastor once giving a talk about his life. He said St. Francis was known as the "gentle saint." He was a model of kindness and patience in guiding souls to Christ. He said this was ironic because St. Francis actually had a fiery, sometimes violent, temper and it did not take a lot to set him off. However, with God's grace he was able to tame his temper, transforming his greatest fault into his greatest strength.

This also reminds me of what a priest once told me in confession years ago. I was struggling with certain temptations and feeling overwhelmed by them. He said that if we surrender ourselves to God and rely on his grace, we can turn our biggest weakness or sinful tendencies into the very path that will lead us to heaven. He gave me the example of St. Mary Magdalene. She was a prostitute, a woman undoubtedly who dealt with sins of immorality. Yet, when she gave heart to Jesus and repented of her sins, something in her shifted.

Mary Magdalene found false love in the men she was involved with, but with Jesus, she found true and pure love. Her desire became not to please men but to please Jesus. We know that she succeeded in purifying her heart and loving Christ deeply because she was granted the grace to be the first person to witness the risen Lord. Like St Francis de Sales her weakness was transformed into her strength. It doesn't mean that they did not struggle but they relied on God's grace and they slowly became their "true" selves.

Now that I am following Jen's advice of separating my sins from my unique quirks, God is helping me to overcome those sinful tendencies. When I fail I like to remember St. Francis de Sales. I'm encouraged to know that God's grace can do anything so I pick myself back up and continue on the path chosen for me.

I read this article at LifeSiteNews.com and thought it was perfect on the anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic.

LifeSiteNews.com: The Untold Story of the Titanic's Catholic Priest Who Went Down Hearing Confessions

Amidst all the tales of chivalry from the Titanic disaster there is one that's not often told.
Fr. Thomas Byles

It is that of Fr. Thomas Byles, the Catholic priest who gave up two spots on a lifeboat in favour of offering spiritual aid to the other victims as they all went down with the "unsinkable" vessel.

A 42-year-old English convert, Fr. Byles was on his way to New York to offer the wedding Mass for his brother William. Reports suggest that he was reciting his breviary on the upper deck when the Titanic struck the iceberg in the twilight hours of Sunday, April 14th, 1912.

According to witnesses, as the ship went down the priest helped women and children get into the lifeboats, then heard confessions, gave absolution, and led passengers in reciting the Rosary.

Agnes McCoy, one of the survivors, says that as the great ship sank, Fr. Byles "stood on the deck with Catholics, Protestants and Jews kneeling around him."

"Father Byles was saying the rosary and praying for the repose of the souls of those about to perish," she told the New York Telegram on April 22, 1912, according to the website devoted to his memory, FatherByles.com.

In the words of the priest's friend Fr. Patrick McKenna, "He twice refused the offer of a place in a boat, saying his duty was to stay on the ship while one soul wanted his ministrations."

Nearly two weeks after the disaster, The Church Progress in St. Louis, Missouri wrote this moving tribute to the heroic priest:

In almost every line that has been written, and in every sentence that has been spoken, there stands boldly out above every other expression a picture of sublime heroism that will be copied into the pages of history. And well it may, for it is deserving of that honor.

But when it is, mention should be made of one whom pens and tongues have almost forgotten in their accounts of this awful sea tragedy. Among those who safely reached the land again no one seems to have been aware of his presence on the ship, but we may hope that many who meet him in a blissful eternity will praise God that Father Thomas Byles was there to administer absolution unto them.

http://www.lifesitenews.com/blog/the-untold-story-of-the-titanics-catholic-priest-who-went-down-hearing-conf

When I first heard about Hallie Lord's new book Style, Sex, and Substance: 10 Catholic Women Consider the Things that Really Matter I was ecstatic to find that many of my favorite Catholic writers/ bloggers/ moms were contributors. I preordered my book and when it finally arrived I planned to devour it immediately. Unfortunately, family circumstances prevented me from having much free time and when I did have a moment the book was never within reach. Finally I downloaded the book onto my Kindle & iPhone so I could read it anytime I had a spare moment. I'm so glad I did!

When I told a fellow mom the title of the book she was a bit skeptical - "Style and Sex?" Those were not high on her radar at this time of her life. Another single friend didn't consider buying the book since she figured it was only for married moms. In reality, there is something here for every Catholic woman (and as this reviewer shows, Catholic men too!) The authors and topics covered are...

Jennifer Fulwiler - How I Fell Out of My Minivan and Found Myself (Catholic Womanhood)

Hallie Lord - Style: Balance, Beauty, and You

Karen Edmisten - God & Godiva

Elizabeth Duffy - Sex, Passion, and Purity

Anna Mitchell - Single and Seeking God's Plan

Rebecca Ryskind Teti - What Works for You?

Rachel Balducci - Fruitful Friendship

Danielle Bean - We Said Yes (Marriage)

Simcha Fisher - Receiving, Creating, and Letting Go: Motherhood in Body and Soul

Barbara Nicolosi - Plugging In and Embracing Discipleship in the 21st Century

I breezed through the pages loving the sense of humor and honesty displayed but I found myself time and time again stopping and re-reading a sentence because it was as if the Holy Spirit was tapping me on the shoulder and telling me to pay attention to the lesson He was trying to teach me.

Although, I read quickly through the book, it is not sufficient to stop there. I really need to go back and think about the points that stood out to me. There are also excellent discussion questions after each chapter that can be answered alone or within a book club. Because of this I've decided to read the book over and dig a little deeper. For the next few Wednesdays (starting April 18) I'll share with you my thoughts about each chapter. Feel free to read along and share your own thoughts as well.

If you don't already have a copy you can order it at Amazon (paperback or kindle) or enter the RoL Birthday Contest to try and win a copy - along with some other goodies! :-)

As a side note: This book is also a great gift! At the last baby shower I attended I gave the new mama a care package of tea, chocolate and this book. A perfect treat when she finally gets five minutes to herself! ;-)

Have a great day and we'll start our discussion next Wednesday (4/18) with Chapter 1. :-)

I have always enjoyed the paintings of Carl Bloch and Gethsemane is one of my favorites. Since I was a child I was intrigued with the thought of an angel consoling Jesus during his agony in the garden. Years later, I heard a priest give a talk explaining that part of Jesus' agony was carrying the weight and the guilt of all the sins of the world. However, he received strength when he saw all the future souls that would love Jesus and would do their best be faithful to God. That thought always stuck with me.

Another time, I was at confession and the priest talked to me about being a comfort to Jesus. He told me to let my heart be a dwelling place that brings comfort to Christ. I immediately thought of the painting of the angel. It is easy for me to call on Jesus and seek his help but something struck a nerve when the priest told me that I could console the heart of Christ. Since then I have often prayed, "Lord, may I never bring you grief, instead may I be a comfort to your heart."

I know I have failed miserably numerous times, but today is an especially good reminder that we are all called to be that solace. Whether we are giving our little ones a hug or helping a troubled coworker or sitting before Our Lord in the tabernacle, our love for God and his children brings comfort to Christ.

In these final days of Lent, let us make a special effort to act as that angel in everything we do. Let us be a source of strength and comfort to Jesus in the garden and on his road to Calvary.

Have a blessed Triduum and Easter Sunday! (I won't be posting again until next week.)

With love,

- I wrote this earlier this morning and then I started cleaning the house. As I was straightening Brian's desk I saw this book: Consoling the Heart of Jesus. A Do It Yourself Retreat Inspired by the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius by Fr. Michael Gaitley.

I started thumbing through it and it looks really good and talks about the very things that have been on my mind in regards to consoling the heart of Christ. I think this will be the perfect book for me to read next. (There is also a condensed companion book.)

It's late so this will be a short post!

Physical - I haven't been walking as usual because the family was hit by a flu bug. It started with JP then made it's way down the line, including me. Thankfully I got sick on the weekend so Brian was here to help me. We timed it well because after I got better, he became sick. He and Andrew were the last two. Hopefully we'll be back to normal soon.

Spiritual - Being a nursemaid to sick children (and a hubby) is a perfect way to teach you patience and humility (nothing like cleaning up vomit to humble you.) I had to keep telling myself that this is where God wants me right now at this moment...this is a gift of love I can offer God....this is a great Lenten sacrifice, etc. It was invigorating at first but after the novelty wore off, about five minutes later, then I was begging for God's grace. As usual, he gave it and I survived. It was a good way to jump start the final two weeks of Lent, so for that I'm thankful.

Okay, it's after 11PM so I better get to bed. Have a restful night!

(Since today is the feast of St. Joseph I thought I would post a past article Brian wrote for RoL.)

The ideal saint for any husband and father is St. Joseph. Why? Because St. Joseph did what every husband and father is capable of doing - God's Will.

Since God never placed a money tree in the back yard of the Holy Family's home, St. Joseph had to provide for his family by earning his living as a carpenter. I'm sure he experienced good days and bad days and months when work was slow. Yet I can picture him, no matter what kind of day or month he had, as working hard and offering his labors to God.

St. Joseph not only provided for his family by keeping a roof over their heads and food on the table, but also by loving them, respecting them and being part of their everyday lives. Just as he was faithful to his temporal duties within the home, St. Joseph was also faithful to his spiritual duties. In Scripture we are told that he listened to and obeyed God. He followed the Law of Moses, this is evident when he and Mary took the infant Jesus to the temple to be circumcised. I am also quite certain that St. Joseph said his daily prayers, faithfully went to the Synagogue, and celebrated the Jewish feasts. He was a man who practiced and lived his faith.

Since becoming a husband and father my relationship with St. Joseph has grown. I not only find myself learning more about him, but also seeking his help and guidance. I have heard many say and write that the saints are worthy of imitation. I totally agree. However after reading the lives of many saints I have often felt discouraged because they lived such extraordinary lives and did so many amazing and holy things. Yet, when I turn to St. Joseph I see someone who humbly followed the law of Moses, faithfully fulfilled his temporal and spiritual duties, obeyed God and loved his family. In my opinion St. Joseph was ordinary, but the ordinariness that surrounded his life as head of the Holy Family is precisely what makes him so great and so holy.

I encourage all of you, especially husbands and fathers, to turn to St. Joseph and seek his intercession and help. He knows exactly what you are going through in providing for the temporal welfare of your families while at the same time being its spiritual head.

St. Joseph, protector of the Holy Family, pray for us!

Hosted by Jen at Conversion Diary.

Last week I mentioned that I was planning on purchasing the book The World of Downton Abbey. I did get it and I love it. The photography is beautiful and it is interesting to read about how the life and times were back then - from the society in general and the war to fashions and the protocol of romantic relationships. It is perfect reading while I m waiting for the next episode to air.

While I have been obsessing over Downton Andrew there is another obsession brewing in our house since I hear this song everyday, several times a day.

Andrew, my four year old, has replaced his love of Pixar's Cars with Spiderman. The other day I bought him a pair of Spiderman pajamas and I had no idea the drama I was inviting into the house because now the only thing he wants to wear are those pj's! He was really upset that he could not wear them to school (in the rain) and I finally convinced him that during the day he had to bundle up and be Peter Parker and keep his Spidey identity "secret." When he got home then he could change into his Spiderman outfit. He finally agreed. So now every day after preschool he runs through the door and whips off his regular clothes and jumps into his Spidey pj's. Great. (Did I also mention that I had to go back to the store and buy another pair of the pj's so I could wash them in between crime fighting?)

Hmmm...on top of it all, Spidey's mom needs to give him a haircut.

Well, living with a boy that dresses like Spiderman isn't really a big deal but I felt so sorry for the little guy the other day. He walked into the kitchen with a roll of masking tape. He wanted me to help him tapes his hands to the wall so he could climb it like Spiderman. I told him he was too heavy and that tape wouldn't hold him. He said okay and ran out of the room. He came back with a gluestick. Surely the double strength of masking tape and a glue stick would hold him. I again explained that it wouldn't work. After several renditions of "It won't work" and "Yeah it do, Mom" he finally got the message. Poor Spidey accepted defeat and went to his room with tears running down his face. He broke my heart so I set dinner aside to help him find a solution. Not having monkey bars in the house I told him to play Spiderman under his bunk bed. There are several rungs above his bed and under top bunk bed. He could grab one rung and pretend to swing while he grabbed another. He was overjoyed. So I'm temporarily in the clear until he decides to jump off the top bunk onto his brother/Dr. Octopus. (I am sure anyone with boys or spunky girls can relate.)

Well, besides all the in-house crime fighting it has been rather a slow week. The kids got sick last weekend with colds and while Bella and Andrew got over it in a day or two little Matthew is still sick and has been extra clingy - to the point where he screams his head off when I put him down for a minute. Ugh. I told Brian I am having a hard time getting my work done since he just wants to be held. He told me not to worry and just give him the TLC he needs. Okay, but I told Brian that if he runs out of clean clothes he'll have to borrow one of Andrew's Spidey outfits.

On the plus side I have been able to get online much more often than normal. (Even now I am doing the one-hand typing thing while Matthew is resting in my arms.) For this quick take I'll link up a few of my favorite articles/posts that I've read this week.

It seems that contentment, thriving where you are in life, and not putting yourself down when you feel like you are barely surviving life with little ones is a common theme this week.

Comparison Kills Contentment {Catholic Mothers Online Post} by Misty

Moms of Young Children: The Time to Thrive Is Now by Jennifer Fulwiler

Thriving! Who does God want you to be? by Arwen Mosher

Don't Carpe Diem by Glennon Melton

Lastly, if you didn't see my previous post already, check out the interview with Mark Wahlberg where he talks about his Catholic faith.

Okay, Matty is finally asleep so I am going to put him to bed and pray he sleeps long enough for me to load the dishwasher and get some laundry done. Spiderman needs some clean pj's.

Have a great weekend!

xoxo,
B.

There are so many crazy and sad stories about Hollywood actors these days that it is refreshing to see someone who is trying to take his faith seriously and trying to live it in their everyday life as best as they know how. I especially love when the story includes the person coming out of a very dark place and into the light of God's grace and mercy. Here's a snippet of an interview with Mark Wahlberg where he talks about his family, his faith and the importance of prayer in his life.

Each week, Catholic personalities Danielle Bean, Rachel Balducci and Carolee McGrath host The Gist. They discuss topics such as abortion, raising teens in the faith and confession. Along with guests such as Martin Sheen, Emilio Estevez, Lino Rulli and others, they will give Catholic women the gist on everything from faith and the Church to exercising, make-up and how to stay sane. Tune in every Wednesday morning for a new show at 10:30 with rebroadcasts Thursday at 8:30 p.m., Friday at 4 p.m., Saturday at 6:30 a.m., Monday at 8 a.m. and Tuesday at 10 p.m. (all times Eastern).

I missed the first show since it is on at 7:30 AM in Cali and I'm usually in the middle of getting kids off to school. However, it is rebroadcast during the week and available to view online. If you missed it, I've added it here. Below I've also added my own comments about the show.

It was wonderful to watch these great Catholic women and moms. I feel like I already "know" them from reading their blogs and columns. There was a lot to be learned and here are a few things that struck a cord with me.

Topic - Working moms.

My take - Danielle said it best, "All moms are working moms." Being a SAHM, I say, "Amen, sister!"

Topic - Comparing ourselves to others.

I loved Rachel's comment, "The only people you can truly analyze is yourself and your situation..."

My take - It is so easy to look at other moms and see how much they are doing and think, how do they do it? It will sometimes make me feel guilty that I am not doing enough. But I have to remember that we are each in different situations and have our own unique vocation as a wife and mother. As long as we are open to God, He will direct us to exactly where we need to be. He'll often challenge us but He won't overwhelm us. If we are overwhelmed we may need to ask, "Am I doing more than I should be and spreading myself too thin?" If not, then ask, "Am I relying on God for my strength or on myself?" (Sigh. Been there. Done that.)

Topic - How do you do it all?

When Danielle asked guest speaker Lisa Hendey, "How do you do it all?" Lisa replied, "If I think about everything that I do in a day, it's too overwhelming. So I start my day with prayer...and that's a key component throughout the day. Praying just for the grace and the energy and the strength to do it all and really, I just do my best with whatever pot that is burning right in front of me...managing the priorities, looking at how I can be of help to other people and most importantly serving my parish and my family."

My take - Prayer, Priorities, Serving family first but not forgetting others. Enough said!

Topic - Lisa talked about saints being role models, intercessors and heroes of our family.

My take - Often when I hear about the saints I wonder how I can relate to them because, well, they are saints. But really, they weren't born with halos on their head. They had the same kind of human struggles we do. They had to fight their personal demons and rely on God to give them the strength to live holy lives. I can certainly learn from that! (Side note; I am in the middle of reading Lisa's book The Handbook for Catholic Moms: Nurturing Your Heart, Mind, Body, and Soul and I am eager to also check out her new book A Book of Saints for Catholic Moms: 52 Companions for Your Heart, Mind, Body, and Soul.)

Topic - Prayer

In the next topic they ladies spoke about the importance of prayer in our daily lives and I love what Rachel said, "Right off the bat, establishing that our prayer life is the most important thing and I think as moms we can so easily justify and rationale away taking time to pray because laundry needs to be done, and lunches need to be made and children need to be cared for, but really, personal holiness and a relationship with God is the most important gift we can give our families."

My take - I am guilty of this all too often! There is always something that needs to be done and although there are times when I can pray as I work, there also needs to be time when I quiet myself and simply focus on God. Some days it may only be for a few minutes but I must be willing to make the effort and establish the priority. Certainly if I have to time to post on my blog, pin an idea on Pinterest or watch a favorite tv show, then I certainly have time to shut it all down and give God a little silence.

Topic - The rosary and adoration.

My take - I love Carolee's comparison of the rosary and exercise. Both are things we tend to want to put off yet both are important to our health (physical and spiritual) and we'll feel better after we are done! And Danielle's thought on Adoration reminded me that just as I ask Brian to watch the kids so I can run to the market alone, I can ask Brian to watch the kids so I can stop at the chapel and speak to God in his presence alone. (And I know he is more than wiling to do it!)

Topic - Family prayer.

My take - This should be a show topic itself! I already commented on this briefly in another post but a number of families I know pray the rosary every night with their kids. I commend them! For us, it has not worked out very well, but rather than forget the whole thing, we've adjusted it to our family needs. Instead, we try to say the rosary but with only one decade. Some nights we're lucky just to gather us all together for a quick night prayer but we do what we can. Each family is different and their needs change as the family grows. The main thing is to be doing something.

Last Thoughts

With that said, I really recommend that you watch the show yourself. At first I was a little reluctant to devote time to it since the topic was on working moms but that was just a small portion of it. There were many topics discussed. On the one hand, it seemed like too many topics. Maybe there could have been less topics and more time spent on one or two subjects. (It seems like the saints, personal prayer or family prayer could have been their own shows.) On the other hand, the flow of conversation carried into many different topics and they commented accordingly. Either way, I really enjoyed the show and actually watched it twice. The second time around is when God impressed certain things on my heart and for that I am thankful.

So thanks, Gist Girls. I look forward to watching you again next week!

Here is a Christmas reflection from my better half. Enjoy!

Today Catholics throughout the world are celebrating Christmas! It is a time of rejoicing, but should also be a time of reflection.

There are a number of "principle players" that make up the story of Christ's birth. Of course there is the most important player, the baby Jesus. From there you have Mary and Joseph, the angel Gabriel and his fellow angels, the Magi, the Star, and last but not least, the Shepherds. Within this story there is another character that Cardinal Albino Luciani, later to be Pope John Paul I, wrote about in a letter from 1977. The letter was entitled, "The Lesson of the Christmas Donkey."

In this short letter, Cardinal Luciani lifts up the Christmas Donkey as a witness to several key virtues that are important for Catholics to live out.

The first trait is "humility." I don't think anyone would deny that donkeys are one of the most humble of creatures. As Catholics, humility is an extremely important virtue especially if you are striving for holiness. To be humble is not to be a human doormat, but rather it is to walk in the light and truth of Jesus Christ. Christmas is a perfect time for us to reflect upon the virtue of humility and how we live it, or not live it, on a daily basis.

The second trait, pointed out by Cardinal Luciani, is the work ethic of the donkey. The donkey is known to be hard working, and as Cardinal Luciani writes, a "tenacious worker," whose function is to carry heavy loads or perform other menial tasks. This image should remind us, as children of God, how laziness is not acceptable. Rather, we are all called to labor and to work for the glory of God, no matter how humble or great the task.

The third trait explored by Cardinal Luciani is how the donkey is a friend of the poor. The Cardinal refers to the donkey as the "right arm of the poor." As we enter the Christmas season and move into the New Year it would be a good idea to reflect on how we view the poor and also whether we, as Catholics, contribute to helping the poor either by a hands on apostolate or through financial assistance.

The fourth and final trait is that the donkey is an animal of "patience and gentleness." Although donkeys are known to be stubborn, they are the gentlest of creatures. Their patience truly shines, especially when they are forced to labor and carry heavy loads for long stretches of time. A good question to ask ourselves would be: do I strive in my interaction with family members, co-workers, even strangers to be an example of "gentleness and patience"?

With Christmas here these lessons from the Christmas donkey can certainly help us to be better Catholics. By practicing humility, working hard, helping the poor, being patient and gentle with others we will certainly reflect the light of Christ into a world that is growing spiritually dark. God bless and Merry Christmas.

I was so excited to hear that one of my favorite bloggers, Hailey at Betty Beguiles, has a new book coming out in spring. It is titled Style, Sex, and Substance: 10 Catholic Women Consider the Things that Really Matter and features many of my favorite Catholic female writers, including Simcha Fisher, Danielle Bean, Rachel Balducci, Betty Duffy, Jennifer Fulwiler, Rebecca Teti, Karen Edmisten, Anna Mitchell and Barbara Nicolosi. How cool is that?

Here is a summary of the book.

In Style, Sex, and Substance: 10 Catholic Women Consider the Things that Really Matter, ten of the top Catholic female writers come together to offer tips, encouragement, and a bit of humor for their sisters in the trenches of daily life. From the difficulties of fitting in prayer time to the impact that lots of babies have on intimacy to the unique challenges of the single life, each author digs deep into the issues that real Catholic women think about. With the tone of a group of gals gathered around a bottle of wine, it is sure to be a hit with all Catholic women, whether they need practical tips in areas in which they struggle, words of encouragement, or just a bit of entertainment after a long day.

Although the book will be released in March, preorders are available at Amazon today. You can get in line after me. ;-)

I first heard about Roma Downey's (did you know she was Catholic?) new DVD Little Angels at CatholicMom.com. The site has background info and is also running a contest to win an autographed copy of the DVD. (I entered!)

Here is the introduction from LittleAngels.com.

Discover the joy of learning and friendship with a heavenly new collection! From Executive Producer Roma Downey ("Touched by an Angel") and Writer Phil Lollar ("Adventures in Odyssey") comes the much-anticipated faith-based educational series, LITTLE ANGELS, soaring onto DVD from Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment.

LITTLE ANGELS is an animated DVD series created exclusively for preschool-aged children to teach not only practical learning skills, like ABCs and 1,2,3s, but also to introduce them to the spiritual, moral and ethical principles of the Bible. Of course, we think it's terrific! (We might be biased...) But don't just take our word for it - for the first time in their organization's history, MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) has awarded a Seal-of-Approval to LITTLE ANGELS.

And here is a sneak peek. :-) It looks cute and educational!

A couple months ago I posted about Abigal, the little girl in Mexico that we sponsored through Christian Foundation for Children & Aging (CFCA). Yesterday we received our first letter from her and I was so touched.

Abigal tells us about her life and her family but it is the closing paragraph that brought tears to my eyes. The translation reads:

"I promise I will make a big effort in the school so that you become proud of me. I will pray every day for you from now on so that God takes care of you and pours blessings upon you wherever you are. I have to close for now. I love you.

Your sponsored friend,
Abigal"

This little girl living in poverty is praying for me, that I will be blessed. It's amazing. I am trying to help out by giving to someone else and instead I am the one who receives the blessings. God is so good.

This sponsorship has also been a great family project! We pray for Abigal and her family every night during our rosary. Bella especially has a soft spot for Abigal since she doesn't have a sister of her own. She writes to her and draws her pictures.

I am hoping to save enough money to sponsor a second child in the future - a little boy that our boys can write to.

There are many, many more kids looking for sponsors, as well as teens and elderly. Advent will be here before you know it. As you prepare to welcome the Christ Child in your heart, prayerfully consider welcoming one of these children into your heart as well.

"Truly, I saw to you, as you do it to one of the least of these my brethren, you did it to me."

Here are just a few kids waiting for someone to help them!

Evelyn from Guatemala (Age: 4) Evelyn is very dynamic at school. She lives with her mother and father and her little brother. Evelyn's mother is a housewife. Her father sells firewood by the meter, but his income is seasonal. Evelyn's family is very interested in moving forward. Talents and pastimes: Drawing and listening to music; Jobs at home: Sweeping in the yard of the home; Favorite school subjects: Natural science; Birthday: January 9, 2007 (CH673993)

Niyati from India (Age: 5) Niyati is well-behaved. She lives with her parents and her younger brother and sister. Niyati has humble parents who struggle to provide an education to their children. Her father is a laborer. He works hard, but earns a low income. Niyati's mother is a housewife. She tries to encourage her children to get an education to improve their lives. Talents and pastimes: Sketching; Jobs at home: Studying; Favorite school subjects: English; Birthday: March 13, 2006 (CH681981)

Eliana from Bolivia (Age: 12) Eliana is a quiet child who likes to help others. She lives with her parents and has three siblings. The family moved to their current location with the hope of better opportunities. Eliana's mother stays home to look after the household. Her father earns a meager income by cutting sugarcane and performing a variety of odd jobs. A Hope for a Family sponsorship can make this family's dreams for a more promising future attainable. Talents and pastimes: Dancing, singing, playing; Jobs at home: Making the bed, washing the dishes; Favorite school subjects: Mathematics; Birthday: April 17, 1999 (CH643300)

Mikel from Costa Rica (Age: 2) Mikel is a joyful and playful boy. He likes to eat a lot. He lives with his mother and grandmother. Mikel's mother stays home to look after him. She is struggling to get ahead with her son. The family lives off the grandmother's pension. Although it is a steady source of income, it is not enough to cover the family's basic needs. Talents and pastimes: Crawling; Birthday: August 20, 2009 (CH652202)

Santiago from Mexico (Age: 3) Santiago is very energetic and he likes doing new things. He lives with his mother and father. As a couple, Santiago's parents trust each other and get along well. They spend time with their child. Santiago's mother is a housewife. His father does upholstery work, but his job is not fixed. Talents and pastimes:
Making puzzles; Jobs at home: Sweeping and cleaning; Birthday: May 6, 2008 (CH672537)

Ronald from Kenya (Age: 6) Ronald loves drawing and playing with his age mates. He lives in a single, rented room with his mother and father and three siblings. Both parents are tailors and they try their best to meet the family needs, especially school fees. Their income is not always enough. Talents and pastimes: Playing football and with toys; Jobs at home: Running errands; Favorite school subjects: Mathematics and English; Birthday:
January 13, 2005 (CH676845)

Remart from the Philippines (Age: 10) Remart is shy yet playful. His ambition is to become an electrician. Remart lives with his parents and his three siblings. His family lives together in a small, rented house. Remart's mother does laundry for others. His father is a plumber. Remart's father works hard to provide a better life for his children. Talents and pastimes: Singing; Jobs at home: Babysitting his younger brother; Favorite school subjects: Mathematics; Birthday: May 27, 2001 (CH673199)

To specifically sponsor one of these children, go to this CFCA link and in the "Help me Find" section to the right, put in the child's country and name. Their profile should pop up. You can also call CFCA at 800.875.6564.

God will bless you for your generosity and sacrifice.

I posted a few weeks back about CFCA (Christian Foundation for Children and Aging) our sponsored child Abi. Yesterday I received an email from Paula K. who recently visited Guatemala. She is trying to find a CFCA sponsor for a little girl named Carla who lives in Guatemala. Please read her story and see if God is asking you to open your heart to bettering her life and the life of her family.

UPDATE: Here is a comment from Paula:

Bobbi, I can't thank you enough for sharing this on your blog. In sharing Carla's story, I have found it challenging to convey that feeling I got in Guatemala among the sponsored children and families, and getting a very true sense of how an expenditure that to a U.S. family can be relatively small (a trip for 5 to Mcdonald's, say), can truly transform the most basic elements of a whole family's life. If any of your readers have questions, please feel free to contact me directly! Although my sign in has my daughter's email address, the best is opuswsk@aol.com. Thanks everyone!!!